Thursday, January 12, 2012
Basketball vs Piano
Routines are a big deal for all kiddos. Routine is essential for Etienne, and when we change our, he comes unglued. For example, this morning, after we dropped the bigs off to school, we came home before we went to the YMCA. Usually, we go straight to the Y. E was very concerned about stopping back home; tearful and whining. Two hours later, we've had some lying, some peeing and some drama. I can tell you because I am his mom that this is what RAD does. I have come to a place of peace with during his mess. Lately, I have this vision of Etienne, sitting on a concrete slab in a loin cloth and tee, yelling. I believe God's burned this memory on my brain to give me patience. Be patient with this boy that never had a snuggle before bedtime. Be patient with this child that learned not to cry because no one ever answered his tears. Be patient with your son because I am patient with you.
Our routine has changed in the last week so I need extra patience. To those who knew me BA (before adoption), I thrived on being busy. Somewhere between Kigali and Iowa, we realized the most important time is between the walls of our home. However, our kiddos need to be allowed to be their own people and so we have to let them pursue their interests outside those walls. Hence the schedule change! Molly's had her acting/drama stuff for awhile and Zeke still does the baby brother tag along with mama thing. Etienne tried sports and made it clear that it wasn't his thing. Blake-man, our virtually vegan boy LOVES LOVES LOVES sports. As of this week, while Blake is at basketball, Etienne has piano. It's hysterical to me that our naturally athletic, freaky strong and graceful Rwandan prefers music lessons while his "twin" longs to be the next All Star (and remember it's even funnier because B looks like an anger free, sweet Eminem). Again, God clearly has a sense of humor, and again, those nuns knew what they were doing. It would be perfectly natural for E and B to be jealous and competitive with each other, living like twins. Instead, by God's grace, their interests and strengths are so different; that Blake has a compassionate heart for E and that E is by nature loving. Such a perfect plan. It's the laughs at Blake climbing into the van in his sweatband with a basketball while Etienne solemnly loads up music books that encourage my patience and restore my hope.