Thursday, February 18, 2010
Etienne and Ezekiel holding hands in the car I again was strugggling to find the words to write but am so aware daily of all our friends and prayer partners that deserve "E/Z" updates! Etienne has been my challenge lately; God knew that this mama couldn't handle two boys having adjustment issues at the same time. Etienne is so hungry for any kind of attention from Ryan and I, it just breaks my heart. He echoes anything that Molly, Blake or Zeke says to us, he pushes his way into our arms/laps/faces. These are okay to tolerate, considering his first three years. My challenge has been that he pees his pants in the evening, most of the time when all 6 of us our playing. The boy is potty trained and has been for awhile, but when Ryan comes home and we are all together, he will pee his pants and then hide in shame. I feel strongly that it is attention seeking behavior but I struggle at our response. We currently discipline him with a time out and straight to bed. However, then he gets the attention he seeks. Ryan feels like maybe he just isn't totally ready and he never got to be a "baby." We just can't seek advice from our friends because none of them ever potty trained a child that lived his first years in an orphanage. I have such guilt after I discpline him and I think its because he and I still haven't "fallen" in love. We just aren't there yet. Throughout the last 6 months, so many people have told us that God doesn't give us anything that we can't handle. I have decided that I disagree, I totally don't buy this. What I mean is that I think that God gave me this totally challenging, slap in the face situation that I CAN'T handle. Not without Him. It's truly the first time in my life that I have felt like I have no tools, nothing except His grace. And I am overwhelmed by this realization. On a funny note, little Zeke is asking to use the potty and doing so correctly! It's hilarious to see his little body balanced on the giant throne. Thank you, giardia, for encouraging early use of the toilet!