That is a statement the pre-adoption me never would have embraced! I love the automatic doors, the "room for one more," the camera on the rear bumper. But mostly I love the space between the kids that gives the opportunity to chat rather than punch each other.
Driving after school earlier this week, Blake said he missed E at recess. It came out that Etienne had been disciplined. I asked him what happened and he said
"I was tired. I guess I am just not a night sleeper. like bats."Sigh. As I type it, my shoulders slouch. Luckily, I didn't have a chance to respond because big sister said "That's good that you know you were tired, E." She didn't miss a beat and asked him why doesn't he sleep all night. He didn't even pause and said that if his diapers didn't get all wet, than maybe he wouldn't wake up.
SNAP! What just happened? We had a moment where apathy left the building. Again, I was still reeling from this statement to reply when Blake said
"Well we should just pray that you get potty trained all the time."Zeke, not to be left out, chimed in with
"That's a good idea!"By this point, I recognized that me keeping out of this was serving a purpose. Etienne and his sibling formulated this prayer plan and recruiting "our friends that keep a secret that E still wears diapers at night."
Love that, right?
Fast forward. The first night, E still woke up wet sometime around 3a. We played it cool (like always, dude, the layers of diapers are totally normal). The kids played it cool too. The second night, Etienne woke up wet but slept longer than he usually does nad RYAN AND I GOT 6hrs OF UNINTERRUPTED SLEEP before the pee.
High fives all around. I turned our morning music up extra loud. We were in praise mode. But this is where the logic hit the fan.
Etienne screamed at me harsher and meaner than he ever has that I wasn't combing his afro right. Desp;ite the "good rest."
He had a meltdown, tears and fists, regarding Blake wearing his underwear by mistake. Even though he slept more hours than usual.
He stole some money from his dad and lied about it to his mom.
All this before 8am.
He missed recess again and will today too for poor choices. Darn it.
I put my hope in rest for a couple days and I know that isn't my source of strength. At 3am this morning, when E started his day, as I tried to massage his muscles and recite Psalms to him, all I could think about was that I can do this. Ryan and I are descent at redirecting ourselves to the foot of the cross. It's just my babies. Molly, Blake and Zeke that are diligently praying for E to be potty trained so than he can "make good choices." Their little faithful hearts.
Do I not mention any of this? Do I remind them that God always, always hears them but that sometimes His timing is different than ours? I know I won't tell them to"pray harder," (dumbest statement ever, non-Christ followers, FYI). God knew that we would have a difficult week and he knew my sweet entourage would react the way they did and he knows how they will respond. And that is what I am choosing to rest in this morning.