I knew that Ryan going to back to school would send poor Etienne spinning. This past week was especially difficult for him to fall asleep without getting banished from the "big boy room," over the top crying and he's had a crazy amount of time outs.
Thursday by lunchtime we were up to 5 time outs, all for either hitting or pushing someone. At the playground, on top of a slide, Etienne pushed Blake full force off the top. I saw the whole thing clearly because I was standing within 3 feet of them. My reaction was to just pick Etienne up, planning to make him sit the rest of the time with me. E had other ideas. SCREAMING "DON'T SPANK ME, DON'T SPANK ME!" over and over at the top of his lungs. Yikes. In front of dozens of other parents. I couldn't get him to quiet down or stop screaming, and the other 2 boys were ready to go. So I put all 43 lbs of Etienne on the Ergo, mostly because I couldn't carry him and hold the other two's hands. At first he became angrier but within a few minutes, Etienne had stopped crying and was relaxing into me. The rest of the day, after every time out, I put him on my back for 10 or 15 minutes. Etienne was able to stop crying more quickly and seemed to love the closeness.
Man, why didn't I think of this sooner? Oh ya. I had all the "experts" telling me about bounderies and discipline; not to mention the physical challenge of my hefty boy being attached to me! Don't get me wrong, I am grateful that my 4 kiddos are well behaved as a result of our strict parenting but we are so behind in the bonding department with Etienne. If I could hit a rewind button, I would totally have given Etienne a lot more affection despite his resistence to it. But life has no "do over," so I have a new approach yet again. I feel rejuvenated too and I know that is just God working within my spirit to see my little buddy through His eyes.
The Ergo has helped in just a few days. Etienne wanted to sit on my lap during prayers last night! I took a brain photo of that moment because this is honestly the first time he ever wanted me. So I may need a back massage and realignment for my birthday, but I will continue to put my 43lb E on my back.